by: Stan Mann

Practical Biz Solutions

The business success newsletter for business owners, top executives, and commission sales people from Stan Mann

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Dear Reader:

Big mistake: assuming that others communicate the same as you.

Have you ever experienced being able to relate easily and comfortable with certain people yet other people are difficult to talk to? This article explains how this happens and how to solve this important problem.

Many an important project has been derailed because of poor communication. Do not make the BIG mistake of assuming that others communicate the same as you. All people do not communicate alike. Recognize that about two thirds of the people with whom you interact have a behavioral style different from yours. To be effective with these two thirds, you must learn to recognize and adapt your behavior to theirs -- and your will triple your ability to make friends and influence people.

You will then have powerful tools for:

1. Gaining Commitment and Cooperation
2. Resolving and Preventing Conflict
3. Building Effective Teams
4. Providing Awesome Customer Service
5. Gaining Influence

~Stan

Lesson I:
HOW TO BE A GREAT COMMUNICATOR

To be a great communicator you must first:

1. Understand your own communication style.
2. Recognize other's communication style.
3. Purposely adopt strategies for more effective communication.

To easily understand behavior-observe whether a person is:

1. Introverted or extroverted
2. Task oriented or people oriented

This gives you four communication styles:

1. Extroverted and task oriented
2. Extroverted and people oriented
3. Introverted and task oriented
4. Introverted and people oriented

To become a great communicator begin by observing yourself

1. Are you more introverted or extroverted. When challenged by a situation, do you hang back to see what develops and try to figure out the best way to handle the situation, or do you immediately step forward to meet the challenge. Note that neither approach is superior. They both have their advantages.

2. Are you task oriented or people oriented-more focused on getting the job done even at the expense of people, or is your first concern the reaction of the people involved?

3. Discover into which of the four categories (described above) you fall.

Understanding this about yourself will start you on your way to becoming a Great Communicator.

Lesson II:
QUICK METHOD OF DETERMINING YOUR BEHAVIORAL STYLE

Knowing your own communication style is the first step in becoming a great communicator. It gives you a basis to understand to whom you naturally communicate well and what you need to do to connect well to people with other styles.

Take this quick assessment to understand your style. In each of the four category lists below there are 10 adjectives. Check all those in each category that would fit your behavior at work.

Read the four categories and select which adjectives come closest to describing you.

CATEGORY I

___ Adventuresome ___ Competitive ___ Daring ___ Decisive ___ Direct ___ Innovative ___ Persistent ___ Problem solver ___ Results oriented ___ Self-starter

CATEGORY II

___ Charming ___ Confident ___ Convincing ___ Enthusiastic ___ Inspiring ___ Optimistic ___ Persuasive ___ Popular ___ Sociable ___ Trusting

CATEGORY III

___ Amiable ___ Friendly ___ Good Listener ___ Patient ___ Relaxed ___ Sincere ___ Stable ___ Steady ___ Team Player ___ Understanding

CATEGORY IV

___ Accurate ___ Analytical ___ Conscientious ___ Diplomatic ___ Fact-finder ___ High standards ___ Quality Conscious ___ Patient ___ Precise

HOW TO SCORE

Count the number of selected adjectives in each category. The category with the highest total is usually the one that best describes your style. You may have a second category with almost the same score. That would be your secondary style.

[Please note: the assessment offered you in session II of this newsletter is a simplified and therefor less accurate assessment than that provided by longer, validated instruments. For a FREE, more accurate, refined and valid profile of your communication style, visit http://www.stanmann.com/free-assessment.html

Lesson III
UNDERSTANDING YOUR PARTICULAR STYLE

After having completed the check list from last Lesson's letter, you have determined your behavior falls into CATEGORY 1, 2, 3 or 4.

IF YOUR BEHAVIOR IS LIKE CATEGORY 1.

Category 1 Measures your Dominance; how you meet challenges. We will now refer to this as CATEGORY D [for Dominance.]

YOUR STRENGTHS ARE

• Direct, results oriented
• Interested in getting the job done
• Enjoys challenges
• Like novelty and a fast paced environment
• A quick thinker
• A big picture person
• Have a lot of drive
• A natural leader
• Lets others know where you stand
• Takes charge

If your behavior is primarily described in category D, you are most likely a direct, results oriented person who enjoys challenges. An extrovert, you are interested in getting the job done. You like novelty and a fast paced environment. You want bottom line answers uncluttered by details. These strengths make you valuable to an organization because you cause action, get things done, even if it involves taking risks. You have a lot of drive and can make a good leader

Shortcomings of CATEGORY D

However, you probably lack patience and cut people off with your direct bottom line approach. Your overriding concern with results tends to discount the people involved. You may be a poor listener and miss valuable insights from others. Under stress you may become insensitive.

HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR EFFECTIVENESS.

You can improve your effectiveness by understanding that you need people. Learn patience and be less irritated when deadlines are missed. It would help you to be more tactful and concerned for the feelings and attitudes of others. People will be more cooperative when you explain your reasons for your conclusions. Endorse others for their contributions. Remember they like it as much as you. Genuine endorsement is a powerful motivator.

FLEXING YOUR STYLE TO INCREASE YOUR EFFECTIVENESS

People more like yourself will respond well to your direct, fast paced, decisive approach. You don't have to flex your style with these people.

However, you will do well to modify your approach to people who behave more like described in the other three categories. Learn the three styles of other people and flex your style accordingly. Future newsletters will give you specific keys for adapting communication to all four categories.

THIS ARTICLE COVERED:

• Biggest mistake when trying to communicate with others.
• Three things you must do to become a powerful communicator.
• How to quickly identify the four basic communication styles.
• Quick method of determining your behavioral style
• Understanding Category I [Dominate] style
• Category I strong points
• Compensating for Category I limitations.

FUTURE ARTICLES:

We will describe CATEGORY 2,3 AND 4 behaviors.

• Their strengths and possible weaknesses
• Tips for improving effectiveness
• How to flex your style to win others to your view

Other articles you may find interesting:

Stan Mann, C.P.C. supports business owners, top executives and commission salespeople to substantially grow their business and have a balanced life. He is a Certified Professional Coach. For additional articles and resources please visit visit http://www.stanmann.com/free-assessment.html

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